Loss Is Hard

Loss is hard! It hurts! It is messy! It is unavoidable! August and September are really bad months for me personally. My son's birthday, my father's birthday, my brother's birthday, the anniversary of my son's passing, also of my father and my brother. So much loss, so much pain, so much turmoil and struggle internally as I wrestle with the loss but also with the joy of knowing where they now are. The only peace I have is in the fact that my father and my brother had surrendered their lives and hearts to Jesus and in the truth that my son was an innocent in the eyes of a loving and caring Father, God. That does bring comfort to me and most of the time it sustains me. But there are times like these two months when the messiness of loss resurfaces and my mind and heart are pulled into an emptiness, a sunken whole within my chest, a black recess within my mind. So, I say it again, loss is hard! Hear me when I say, I get it. I really do. But loss, no matter how painful it is or emotionally draining it can be to endure, can never still our joy unless we let it. The joy of knowing Jesus, the joy of experiencing his tender compassion, the joy of sharing in his goodness, can never be taken away unless we allow it to be. My strength, in times like these, comes only from Jesus and often times Jesus comes to us through his church, to love on us, to comfort us, to share in our sorrows and our burdens and our joys.